I’m sure most of you are in the same boat as me with this one, but the one thing on this Earth I find the most difficult is admitting defeat.
A seemingly simple technology issue? I won’t let it beat me. A challenge from someone? I will win. I am competitive and always have been. Which is what makes writing this post so excruciatingly difficult, embarrassing, mortifying and against EVERYTHING I STAND FOR.
I can’t do it anymore. And you know what “it” is? THE GOD DAMN BODY COACH.
I can only imagine how many I-told-you-so’s are being thought right now as people are reading this and it is giving me this tense feeling in my stomach that I can’t put into words. You know when you do/say something awkward and it makes every single muscle in your body clench and tense up? That.
But yes – I am quitting the 90 Day SSS plan. After talking about it so much, writing several blog posts about how amazing it was going to be, how much better I was going to feel, how perfect it was for me, I am jacking it all in. Why? It’s just too bloody hard.
And I can promise you that “it’s too hard” isn’t an excuse. It’s a necessity. I can no longer eat 3x what my stomach wants me to eat, I can no longer restrict myself, I can no longer do HIIT. I detest all of it.
This is all so melodramatic, Jesus Christ.
Basically guys, if you didn’t already know, a few months ago I paid for and begun a fitness plan. Joe and I did it really well for the first month (it’s split into 3 month long “cycles”) but then when it came to sending off for the second cycle, we couldn’t do it. I desperately want to get back into shape – I’ve done it before and I know I can do it again – but from trying my very hardest at this plan I have come away knowing one thing. It’s just not for me.
And why? Well there are a few reasons.
1. I have discovered I hate HIIT. I never tried HIIT before this plan and if you ask me, you have to do exercise that you like otherwise you won’t do it. I know that HIIT is amazing for results but I can’t get past how much I hate it. I much prefer going for a run, doing a weights session or doing a class at the gym. That’s just personal preference.
2. I thought I had a big appetite but JESUS. Before I started the plan, I researched into it SO MUCH. Everyone said that the portions were sizable but nothing could have prepared me for how much food there was. It got to the point where I was feeling physically sick after meals and yet the advice was still “you’re fuelling your body, you need to eat it all if you can”. Nah mate, I’m gonna eat til I’m full, thanks.
3. I’m fricking lazy. I’m not ashamed to admit that. I like healthy food and I like exercise – I really do! But I’m lazy. I like healthy food that doesn’t take long to prepare and I like going down to the gym and doing exercise I enjoy on my own time. I don’t like having to give up my entire weekend (and I mean my ENTIRE weekend) to cook meals for the week and I don’t having to time my workouts around protein shakes and supplements.
4. It’s awkward as hell having to organise your life around all this stuff when you’re living with your boyfriend’s parents. Joe’s Mum and Dad were fab but it just wasn’t working for me – I felt like we were taking over their kitchen. They weren’t even doing the plan and they had to time their lives around it and that’s not fair.
Story time. A couple of years ago, I went through a mad health kick. I’d just been put on Sertraline for my anxiety and I was about half way through a year-long work placement. It was the best time of my life. I lost 2 dress sizes and gained so much mentally in only 3 months and I did that all off my own back. So I’m gonna start that again because screw doing things I don’t enjoy.
(Just a quick FYI – I AM still going to be following some of the basic plan principles. The reduced carbs on rest days and high carb on workout days really did agree with me and I did really enjoy the food minus the insane portions – so I’ve bought the Joe Wicks cookbook instead. It has some really lovely recipes, just in case anyone looking for some healthy inspo!)
And to be honest – I don’t care. I flipping hated it and I’ve learned that. Tonight I’m going down to the local gym and signing myself up. I’m going to start 10k training again, I’m going to be doing weights again and I’m going to get my bum to some classes. I’m going to be making healthier lunches, tweaking meals, cutting down on the wine and generally making healthier choices. I may not lose 5 dress sizes in 3 months doing it this way, but I can promise I’ll be a lot flipping happier.
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